What a Toxic Damn Relationship -a blog series- part 1 of 6
I have an amazing career. I have the opportunity to help people find happiness within themselves and heal what feels broken. The issue for me is that these fabulous humans arrive with a very long history of broken trust and misinformation. In the process of trying to make themselves better they feel worse. Consequently, I end up furious. I empathize deeply because I know that we are part of a fucked up culture that breaks us down while swearing it’s building us up.
It’s a totally toxic relationship.
Seriously, How long have you been unhappy with your body, like really unhappy? For how long have you been trying to lose weight? For many people it’s been a lifelong struggle. Have you ever been in a really bad relationship, like a really bad one? Let’s take a look at what these two shitty things have in common.
Both give us false hope
Both lie to us
Both disappoint us
Both leave us feeling broken and worthless.
Both prey on our perceived weakness.
We start to think it’s our fault.
We lose sight of our values.
We lose our identity.
We lose control over our actions (autonomy).
All we really wanted to do was be happy and elevate our own self worth and yet here we are…again. It’s our fault, it must be. We feel so desperate that we are willing to believe anything and here comes the lie. Off we go again on this crazy ass toxic ride.
This toxic relationship is lifelong for many of us. Yet, everyone thinks they are the only one suffering and that everyone else seems happy and looks perfect. They judge themselves for being shallow, how could they be upset about how they feel when there are people out there with “real problems” . Whats not real about hating yourself and being desperate to change yet feeling hopeless. This is seriously vulnerable shit and it does hurt. When you cant go in the pool with your kid because you dont want to put a bathing suit on or you cant go out with your friends because you don’t have clothes that fit and your embarrassed you feel less than, You may feel completely worthless.